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(:E cries at...

Hernan's Blog of Hate!

[ Sunday, March 16, 2003 ]


Friends again (rewritten after a 2:28 AM BSOD and restart).

(Read with caution.)
(I'm not writting to the friends about SW, also.)

You can learn so much from friends' life and decisions:

1. Marihuana, gets you on the trip you want to. You need some "expertise coefficient" tho. o/~ sensimilla... marihuana o/~ Yeah, see colors, smell, hear, travel, imagine, et cetera, uh huh.

2. X. The strobber and stuff. ... that you shouldnt drink water, if not by small swallows. That if the effect is fading, and you wanna keep high, you should curl up for about five seconds (in X time scale that's about 1.3 secs) and rapidly stand up. That you should get water through refilling the bottle in the bathrooms, slow and stuff, but you should. That if you sweat cold, you should go out for some fresh air...

3. That coke is not something to play with, the sad part is that you only believe it when you are over it (too late), which is difficult, for it is a psychological and not physical addiction. It gets you lucid, you are the king of the world, it cures any illness (like drunkness). And it's so easy to hook up, is mainly by 2 reasons: 1. you got a solution for your social weakness issues which is not convenient for you to lose and 2. the only easy way to get out of the desperation when the effect is fading is through another "pass".

4. That he who you wouldnt imagine has been there in the low world. Before you, who are supposedly the "lived" one.

5. That sex could not feel comfortable when you do it with your girlfriend just as you do it with your best friend, who happened to become your girlfriend's best friend too. She knows all but the girlfriend ignores it.

6. That love in the distance for that perfect one does not work, when in that "distant" context there's another one like you feeling exactly the same. And your friend who flew over there ended up liking him.

7. That having kids is not worth the mother's beauty and sex when she's a total sucker, hates you, and she's the victim in every situation, and all your friends end up hating her, because she's insoportable.

8. That I'm lucky to have friends in different disciplines: Systems (web and graphic design, design patterns and programming, nets and security, auditing, consulting and business intelligence-balanced scorecard et cetera, database management...), comunnication, psychology, medicine, marketing, music & producing, drums... Why? Because they will not compete that much with you is one valid reason.

9. Drunk car spinning using your hand break with some "neo-clown" and some other indiferent friends it's not a good practice.

10. That friends (yeah them) go regularly over to hookers. That friends can end up begging you for 60000 pesos for a desperate fuck.

11. That friends get deported from other countries just for being careless.

12. That you should keep away from low "shows", like breaking your teeth at an after party without noticing when and why. Like the decent daddy's girl throwing up her guts in public. Like the guy who fell drunk into the disco's urinals. Like the guy who smoked and drank with his foreign friend, and had to presence, some minutes later, his death in a car accident, by some girlfriend who was driving asleep, and because of that he never drank again. Like the guy who, stoned, threw himself from a bus and landed under some bridge, to throw his insides out and end up waking up hours later in that same place. Like the promissing girl who died along with some others in a car when going down from a party at a nearby town. Like the concurrent aborts stories. Like these girls who drunk, after a day of "you shouldnt drink" recrimination to others, ended up all covered in their own shit, partying suddenly with the rest as if nothing. Like the raped friend. Like the relative who got robbed for being stoned. Like the girl in the party with a terminal illness in her eyes... Like some crappy indigent buying crack before your eyes with miserable 500 pesos. ... ... ... ... ...

13. Suicide attempts...

The list may seem endless. I've stepped into some crap too, but never as hardcore, because I've been there through your stories. I already know how it's gonna end. I love you all for that. I sometimes just like to watch, anything goes I almost always say, let's confront the monsters, let's learn something about life today.

Dont get me wrong, all of my friends are very valuable people, not because of their experiences in life, because of what's in their heads and how they handle themselves. I cried with you even when none of that happened to me, just as I celebrated when you succeeded. Knowledge comes from every moment, you just have to recognize it.

One final thought: I guess you need to be and die crazy to be remembered. "Oh, my God, like this person who overdosed! He was sooo bright, I must go buy something from him/her" .. there you go, you ICON!! you wont be forgotten, unlike some ordinary guy who died naturally. But the price is you'll be remembered because of a deplorable imagery.

Hernán [6:39 PM] -

the hatemachine,
according to svigle